How You Gonna Come Redux

The Bush administration is purging the CIA of hippies, freaks, ho's, Democrats, and anyone else found not to be totally batshit crazy?!?!

Did they just miss some the first time, or have the standards for batshit crazy gone way up?

Discuss.

I'm Your Cynosure, You Can Call Me Anytime.

"I'll be your connection to the party line"

Oh lordy I love me some Pink and not just 'cause she's smoke'n hot. (h/t Atrios)

Jim wants you all to play a little game.

Glen wants to know why the media keeps treating proven dumb-asses like infallible sages while treating the people who actually know what they are talking about like barking mad glue sniffers.

Steve wants to known how my Fitzmass Card for Karl is coming.

Kevin, calls batshit crazy what it is : Batshit Fucking Crazy.

Blog Role Update

A few updates :

• Frequent commenter and good friend NotoriousMJT has a blog. You should all read it, if for no other reason than it's only got 3 post and won't take you that long ;).


• Jim over at Unqualified Offerings has a great blog I try to read every day. Jim inspired my first blog post. Since Jim is the only blogger to link to more than one of my blog posts who I do not happen to cook dinner for on occasion, I feel like I owe him a link.


• The Washington Note and Unclaimed Territory are both interesting blogs that I've started reading recently.

"don't be ridi-cool-us."

This entry over at Laura's blog has given us a great idea: Let's bring back Perfect Strangers.



Of course we will need to update it. You know, make it all timely and shit.

We picture Mohammad Nahavandian as the spunky foreign guy with the funny accent and Michael Ledeen as his clueless, strait laced "cousin".

Here's how we see the new series:

Nahavandian, the senior aide to Iran's top nuclear negotiator, gets assigned the tricky task of going to the US and finding out if everyone in the US government is really as crazy as they sound on FOX News.

Money for the mission is a little tight because Iranian president Ahmadinejad has most of the nation's petty cash tide up in eBay bids for centrifuge parts. So, in an attempt to keep the budget down, Iranian intelligence gives Nahavandian Michael Ledeen's address. "We know it's not much, but he's the only guy we ever false flagged who is actually stupid enough to believe you're an Iranian dissident. Tell him your his long lost cousin or something and he'll probably let you crash on his couch." Nahavandian's handlers tell him.

So Nahavandian puts on his favorite shiny red shirt, grabs his old green card, and boards a flight for Washington. As a high ranking representative of one of the Axises of Evil he naturally has no problem clearing customs. [ed. We know that part sounds weak, but it's what appears to have happened in real life so we'll leave it in.]

In Washington DC, penniless and hungry, Nahavandian knocks nervously on Ledeen's door. His new "cousin" answers the door in a blue sweater emblazon with the Shaw of Iran's face and the words "Viva La Revolution!".

Michael is thrilled to welcome his new cousin, especially once he hears that Nahavandian is a Iranian dissident! In almost no time at all Michael finds Nahavandian a job as the National Review's official Iranian Freedom Blogger. Michael even loans Nahavandian his access badge to the American Enterprise Institute so he can stock up on office supplies and hit the free buffet when he gets hungry.

Before the day is done Nahavandian creates a firestorm of controversy over at The Corner by posting that to the bests of his knowledge, the Iranian ayatollahs do not actually eat baby heads or any other baby parts that he is aware of. Nahavandian even manages to get hold of someone at the state department, unfortunately that person hangs up as soon as they figure out that they are talking to a real live member if the Iranian government calling from the DC area code.

We can all look forward to hours of entertainment as Nahavandian's adventures land him in one sticky situation after another. We'll laugh till it hurts as Nahavandian struggles to understand the mind of the American neo-con and tries to help his new cousin Michael with his love life; all while disarming one serious international incident after the other with his spunky can do attitude and hilarious foreign catch-phrases like "An Iranian nuclear weapons program ...Oh don't be ridi-cool-us!"

Please note: this is our attempt at a parody. Yes, the real Nahavandian really is in tghe country and he really is a member of the Iranian goverment and, golly gee, we just don't know how that happened. That's all wierd enough, but if Nahavandian does turn up in the buffet line at the AEI or if he really is crashing on Ledeen's couch, we are going to have to move to Canada.

Men Without Hats to Tour Iran

On Thursday Iran went and enriched themselves some uranium.

And what does a county like Iran do when it's officially joined the "Fuck You We've Got Our Own Uranium Enrichment Facilities" club?

Exactly the same thing every other country does :

Men in traditional uniforms danced Tuesday during a parade in
Mashhad and lifted containers said to hold uranium enriched by Iran.

The Safety Dance.

In a speech to the nation, a clearly drunk Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad shouted

"I've got some enriched uranium for George Bush. But if he wants it he is going to have to come get it. It's right here in my pants baby!

Ahmadinejad them made a very rude gesture before beginning to dance wildly around the podium accompanied by a midget playing a ukelele.

Just a Reminder

The show that kicks all other shows ass is back tonight on Spike TV.

Will there be puking? Will there be blood? [ed. Oh yes, there will be blood.] Will coaches Ken Shamrock and Tito Ortiz kill each other befor the episode is done? Will one of the contestants turn out to be a big pussy? We can only hope.

If I Had a Hammer ...

The Poor Man makes a modest proposal that we all rally round the flag and sing that "If I had A Hammer" song.

Personally I think a big idea like that needs a slogan. How does

"Crucifixion; Not just for Jesus any more."

sound to everybody ?

I'm Shrill Beatch!

Well I've never it said before but, via War and Piece, that was then this is now :

Impeach George Bush. Impeach him Now!

I may be late to the party but at least I'm in good company.